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Forget the birds and the bee's rubbish. These are the true facts of life!
The difference between animals and humans is the fact that humans commit murder. That is why you will never see an animal version of Cluedo
My mum used to say to me "Life is like a game of Monopoly. You go round and round in circles. Sometimes you land on Free Parking, Sometimes you go to jail and you could end up with a hotel on Park Lane." I never believed her until I came second in a beauty contest.
People who claim to have been abducted by aliens all give the same description - big head, large black,round eyes and small bodies. That is why I believe they have in fact been abducted by pandas. They are obviously too ashamed to admit they have been taken by the kindest of all the bears so make up the alien story as a cover up.
Teachers always know someone who has broken their neck by leaning on two legs of their chair. Is this the same boy or has their been a cover up of people with broken necks. There are millions of teachers so are their millions of children in a hospital somewhere? The same could be said for people poking their eyes out with scissors